A Cape Bretoner, an Irishman and an Englishman
were sitting in a bar.
There was only one other person in the bar; a
man.
The three men kept looking at this other man,
for he seemed terribly familiar.
They stared and stared, wondering where they
had seen him before,
when suddenly the Irishman cried out, "My God,
I know who that man is. It's Jesus!"
The others looked again and, sure enough, it was
Jesus himself, sitting alone at a table.
The Irishman calls out, "Hey! Hey, you! Are you
Jesus?"
The man looks over at him, smiles a small smile
and nods his head.
Yes, I am Jesus," he says. The Irishman calls
the bartender over and says to him,
"I'd like you to give Jesus over there a pint
of Guinness from me.
"So the bartender pours Jesus a Guinness and
takes it over to his table.
Jesus looks over, raises his glass, smiles thank
you and drinks.
The Englishman then calls out, "Er, excuse me
Sir, but would you be Jesus?"
Jesus smiles and says, "Yes, I am Jesus."
The Englishman beckons the bartender and tells
him to send over a pint of Newcastle Brown Ale for Jesus,
which the bartender duly does. As before, Jesus
accepts the drink and smiles over at the men.
Then the Cape Bretoner calls out, "Hey b'y! Are
you Jesus, or wot?"
Jesus nods and says, "Yes, I am Jesus." The Cape
Bretoner is mighty impressed and
has the bartender send over a Keith's for Jesus,
which he accepts with pleasure.
Some time later, after finishing the drinks,
Jesus leaves his seat and approaches the three
men.
He reaches for the hand of the Irishman and shakes
it, thanking him for the Guinness.
When he lets go, the Irishman gives a cry of
amazement.
"Oh God, the arthritis is gone," he says. "The
arthritis I've had for years is gone. It's a miracle!"
Jesus then shakes the hand of the Englishman,
thanking him for the Newcastle Brown Ale.
Upon letting go, the Englishman's eyes widen
in shock. "By jove," he exclaims, "The migraine I've had for over 40
years is completely gone. It's a miracle!"
Jesus then approaches the Cape Bretoner,
who has
a terrified look on his face.
Back off bye. I'm on worker's comp!!"
Take it easy